So as I’m sure you’ve noticed I’ve been MIA on here for a while now. The reason? I’m planning my wedding!!!! And let me tell you, wedding planning is a full time job. So factor that in with a real full time job and everyday life stuff that doesn’t stop I’m kinda busy. lol All my blogging these days is done over at my wedding blog. So if you’d like feel free to go check it out and follow along! Feel free to leave comments….you don’t have to have an account to do so!
Meanwhile, this just happened to me….
A lady police officer was in the office to leave some paperwork for my boss. This lady comes in being all kinds of nosey and asks what’s going on with the project. (See, like many other businesses, we’ve been hit hard by the economy and the project is currently on hold.) The lady goes on and on and apparently doesn’t understand anything I’m saying! (Nothing new, apparently I speak another language to some people.) So the lady finally leaves (whew!)…the officer looks at me and goes “I don’t know how you just handled that. I mean no offense to her but did she not understand a word you were saying!?” Soon followed by the officer saying “And I thought my job was interesting!” You know you have a hard/challenging/interesting job when a POLICE OFFICER tells you that!
Well, that’s all for now. I just thought I’d update you all really quickly as to why I haven’t been posting.
I got this in an e-mail from a friend and find it VERY interesting.
House #1:
A 10,000 square foot, 20 room mansion (not including 8 bathrooms) heated by natural gas. Add on a pool (and a pool house) and a separate guest house, all heated by gas. In one month this residence consumes more energy than the average American household does in a year. The average bill for electricity and natural gas runs over $2400 per month. In natural gas alone, this property consumes more than 20 times the national average for an American home.. This house is not situated in a Northern or Midwestern “snow belt“ area. It’s in the South.
House #2:
Designed by an architecture professor at a leading national university. This house incorporates every “green“ feature current home construction can provide. The house is 4,000 square feet (4 bedrooms) and is nestled on a high prairie in the American southwest. A central closet in the house holds geothermal heat-pumps drawing ground water through pipes sunk 300 feet into the ground.
The water (usually 67 degrees F) heats the house in the winter and cools it in the summer. The system uses no fossil fuels such as oil or natural gas and it consumes 25% of the electricity required for a conventional heating/cooling system. Rainwater from the roof is collected and funneled into a 25,000 gallon underground cistern. Wastewater from showers, sinks and toilets goes into underground purifying tanks and then into the cistern. The collected water then irrigates the land surrounding the house. Surrounding flowers and shrubs native to the area enable the property to blend into the surrounding rural landscape.
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HOUSE #1 (20 room energy guzzling mansion) is outside of Nashville, Tennessee. It is the abode of that renowned “environmentalist” (and filmmaker) Al Gore.
HOUSE #2 (model eco-friendly house) is on a ranch near Crawford, Texas. Also known as “the Texas White House,” is is the private residence of the President of the United States, George W. Bush.
So whose house is gentler on the environment? Yet another story you WON’T hear on CNN, CBS, ABS, NBC, MSNBC or read about in the New York Times or the Washington Post. Indeed, for Mr. Gore, it’s truly “an inconvenient truth.”
And, yes…I DID check Snopes prior to forwarding it. You can verify it at : http://www.snopes.com/politics/bush/house.asp
After MONTHS of waiting to get my ring and wondering when it would happen I finally have it! And let me tell you I cannot stop looking at it! All of the following pictures were taken by me…but they don’t begin to do the ring justice. 
I picked out the center stone and the band myself and I’m so glad I did because I love my ring! If you like what you see, be sure to check out Blue Nile. They have a wonderful website where you can design your own ring!
Diamond Details: 0.41-Carat Cushion-Cut Diamond, Very Good-cut, D-color, and VVS2-clarity.
Band Details: Pavé-Set Diamond Cathedral Ring in 18k Yellow Gold. This 18k gold setting is accented with 18 pavé-set diamonds, elegantly highlighting the center diamond. 1/5 carat total diamond weight (for the band).
Total carat weight for the ring is 0.61. There is a matching band that I will have as my wedding band that has 18 pavé-set diamonds.
I’M ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It happened Thursday night around 10:45. Charles came by my house after he got off work. I didn’t know it was him though at first. Our dogs started barking like crazy as if someone was here but my mom kept telling me no one was. I wasn’t all that worried about it though because I was busy rolling up the silverware for my brother’s rehearsal dinner for Friday night. Next thing I know the door bell rings. When mom didn’t make a move to go see who it was I had a really strong feeling it was him.
We said hi and hugged and kissed and I asked him what he was doing at the house. He said he had something to show me on his computer. It was a slideshow movie that he had out together with pictures of us throughout our relationship, including our first date. It also included slides that said I would be getting dinner at Olive Garden, bowling at the Community Center and a trip to the Wax Museum in Gatlinburg (a recreation of our first date). At the end some slides came up that said “will you marry me?”, he got down on one knee and pulled out my ring. OMG I was freaking out inside because it was so beautiful. Of course I said yes…..duh! lol
My hope for a date is the 8th of May, 2010. But it’s going to depend on the availability of the photographer I’m wanting to use. I e-mailed him tonight and hope to hear back from him soon. Be sure to check out their INCREDIBLE work at www.hope-photo.com.
Also, my brother is now a married man and I now have a wonderful sister-in-law! The wedding was beautiful and somehow I managed not to cry although the waterworks almost started several times. We could not have asked for more perfect weather. It was a bit warmer than we expected and I got sunburned but it was just a fabulous day all around! Sadly I didn’t get one single picture myself so I have nothing to show of the day. As soon as I get some pics from family and friends I will pass them along!
*P.S.- Pictures of my ring coming soon!
My “little” brother or as I affectionately call him my little big brother is getting married!! Ahh…I cannot believe it! It seems like only yesterday when I was taking pictures while he proposed to Jessica. But that’s been more than six months ago now. My how time flies!
I have mixed emotions about the whole thing though. I mean he’s been a part of my everyday life for the last 22 years and now he won’t be anymore. Granted, he has been spending lots of time with Jessica staying the night in the Valley because it’s closer to her and his job. So I guess lately he hasn’t really been an everyday part of my life…but pretty close. Always before I knew he’d come home eventually. But after Saturday that won’t be happening anymore.
I am so incredibly happy for him, so glad he’s truly happy and so thankful that he’s found a Godly woman to be his wife. I pray the Lord pours His blessings out upon them.
It’s going to be a major adjustment for me and mom not to have him around the house. To help change a lightbulb because standing on his flat feet he can reach with no problem….when mom and I need a ladder to reach. lol Helping keep the yard mowed and looking nice. Helping with little “construction” related fix-it jobs. Helping get the garbage to the dump and so much more.
But most of all, he just won’t be there. No more family movie nights with him. No more just enjoying him. No more griping at each other. lol (not sure I’ll miss that too much!) No more quality time with him, his mom and sister. No more late night talks about some of the most random things. No more going to concerts together to see our favorite bands. It makes me sad just thinking about it and as I type this sitting here at work I’m trying desperately hard to hold back the tears. I know this isn’t the end. I know he’ll always be my brother, that I’ll see him again, etc. But it’s still hard.I consider my brother one of my closest and best friends.
Mom is having some of the same feelings except on a much deeper level obviously. He is afterall her only son, her baby. And he’s all grown up and getting married. She gave birth to him, calmed him when he cried, rocked him to sleep, comforted him when he was scared/frightened, helped him in any way possible, put up with him playing “hide and seek” in the very large and busy malls in Dallas nearly giving her a heart attack (lol), prayed for him constantly to tbe the man of God that she knew he could be, walk through the hard times with him, encouraged him when there was no one else to do so, listened to him when he needed to vent, gave him wise counsel and direction…I could seriously go on for probably forever but I won’t bore you, I think you get the idea.
Anyways, while this is an extremely joyous occasion in our family it is also emotionally hard as well. After the wedding I’ll try and get some pictures posted on here. However, not sure how many and of what I’ll be able to take since I’ll be in the wedding myself.
I am SO excited to announce that I now have my Stained Glass work for sale at Mountain Crafts & Arts located at 1133 Parkway Gatlinburg, TN 37738. (In the old Mountain Market building next to the Texaco Gas Station). The store is located right off the Parkway just before the entrance to the Great Smoky Mountains National Park so be sure to stop by!
If you’re in the area and are looking for a unique handmade gift then stop on in and take a look at my work!
See something at the store but you need more quantity than is on display? Please feel free to contact me and let me know how I can help you.
Here are some “Before” pictures of my “booth” at the store. And some “After” shots with all my work on display! (Click on thumbnail to enlarge.)
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- Before Shot 1
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- Before Shot 2
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- Before Shot 3
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- Before Shot 4
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- After Shot
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- After Shot 2
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- After Shot 3
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- After Shot 4
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- After Shot 5
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- After Shot 6
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- After Shot 7
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- After Shot 8
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- After Shot 9
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- After Shot 10
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- After Shot 11
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- After Shot 12
So I have a song that I am just *in love* with. It’s called Blue Sky and it’s by Francesca Battistelli. Can I just say she is freaking amazing? I got her album off iTunes late last week and I cannot stop listening to it. Her songs are so uplifting, upbeat and positive. Blue Sky is my theme song for right now. I swear, I have listened to it over and over again all week on my way to and from work. I must look like a retard bobbing around in my car, my mouth moving a million miles an hour as I sing along, with the biggest smile on my face. lol But I don’t care. I love this song and the meaning behind the lyrics. My blue sky is found in His love! 
Take a listen!
(Right click on the link and open it in a new window to view the lyrics while listening.)
And here are the lyrics:
When you’re down and you’re out
And you don’t think you have a friend
When you’re lost in the doubt
And you can’t see what’s around the bend
Just hold on
Don’t turn around
Keep on walking
Don’t lose heart
‘Cause I am here, I am here
Wherever you are, wherever you are
(Chorus)
When the rain is falling
And there’s no silver lining
And you just can’t seem to find the light
When you need a reason
To help you keep believing
Let my love be your blue sky
Don’t you know that I know
Life can be so hard it makes you wanna give up
But don’t you know over the horizon
The sunny day you’re looking for
Is waiting right here in my love
Just hold on
Don’t turn around
Keep on walking
Don’t lose heart
‘Cause I am here, I am here
Wherever you are, wherever you are
(Chorus)
Come on come on
Don’t you be afraid
Whatever comes tomorrow
My love is here to stay
(Chorus)
Be sure to check out her album My Paper Heart…it rocks!
Wow, I sure have been blogging a lot this week. I think this is a record for me. lol This is most likely going to get lengthy so I’ll apologize ahead of time. It will also probably end up being a little sporadic and all over the place so sorry for that too. If you stick in there and read through the whole thing…thank you!
Back in November, on my birthday to be exact, my father called me after about 5 years of no communication. You see, for those of you who do not know, he had an affair when he was married to my mother and chose to leave our family. I was very clear with him that I wouldn’t have a relationship with him as long as he continued to have self-destructing behavior, wasn’t living in the will of God and was still drinking (he’s an alcoholic). It became pretty clear that he chose his new girlfriend over his own children when we read in the paper that they were getting married. Now before you go and say I need to forgive him, move on, and have a relationship with him…..wait just a minute. I get those comments ALL the flippin’ time and it makes me so mad. I have forgiven my dad. He is my father and I love him. However, I do not have to have a relationship with him in order for those things to be true.
Anyways, on my birthday when he called he did most of the talking and I just cried and cried. For the first time since he left the things he said to be heartfelt and genuine to the core. When he said he was sorry I think he really meant it. It seemed like my dad was back. You see when he left he really wasn’t the person I called dad any longer. He had changed so much. Dad said he hoped that some day we would be able to have a relationship again. And said that he had no expectations of when it would happen, whether it be a month, 6 months, 1 year or 10 years down the road. He also told me that he wanted me to set the pace for things so that I wouldn’t feel like he was pressuring me. I think one of the main reasons I was able to even talk to him about any kind of a relationship is because my brother had been having steady contact with him for several months at the time. I had heard nothing from my brother indicating that it was an unstable relationship.
It was no easy conversation. After being absent from my life for so long I cannot just pickup things where we left off before all this happened. I still worry about being manipulated and being hurt by him yet again. If it was just him I think everything would be easier. However it’s not just him, he has a new wife and two step-sons. His new wife was actually one of my managers at a restaurant I worked at. My dad was the director of operations for the company and that’s how they originally knew each other. After my dad’s mother died in July of 2003, he never got over her death, didn’t grieve properly and went off the deep end and that’s when the affair started. I’ll spare you all the tons and tons of details there are that go along with all this. In any case, I have forgiven them both. But I know that I will never be able to have any kind of relationship with his new wife. While it is not necessary in order to forgive, I (nor my mom) have never received an apology or anything of the like from her and don’t think I ever will. It would be nice to hear her say something along those lines but like I said not required in order to forgive.
After the phone call with him I decided quickly that contact would be via phone for a long while. I knew I was not going to be ready to see him anytime soon. However, I knew I would see him sooner or later whether I was ready or not because my brother is getting married on April 18th. I had hopes that things would be to the point where I would want to see dad. I also had this very strong feeling that I would never have anything close to the kind of relationship I once had with him.
As I said, he left the contact up to me. I found myself thinking that I needed to call him but every time it crossed my mind I was unable to do so because I was at work or in the middle of something I couldn’t put down. The last time I talked to him on the phone was Christmas day. And the last time I sent or received a text message from him was on New Year’s Eve. I haven’t made the effort to contact him for a few reasons. He is still often behind on his alimony payments to my mom which I find unacceptable. And there are some other circumstances that I will not go into on this blog. The bottom line is that I have felt it was the right thing for me not to be in close (or much of any) contact with him during this time.
Remember when I mentioned having to see him whether I wanted to or not at my brother’s wedding? Well, his wedding is a month and 5 days away. He will be there. I don’t know what to do because I don’t want him to come up to me and try and hug me or anything because I’m just not at that point. I’m not ready. I really thought after we talked on my birthday that I would be but I’m just not. Even seeing him will be a little hard. It’s very hard to explain but it’s like a war going on in my head. Part of my brain thinks “run to him, be daddy’s little girl again, hug him, talk to him, etc” and the other part of my brain is saying “take your time, don’t give too much, remember how manipulative he was, you don’t want to get hurt again, etc”.
And to top it all off, I found out this week that not only will he be there but his wife and her children will be there as well. And not only will they be at the wedding but they will all be at the rehearsal dinner the night before….which my mom is paying for and hosting as the mother of the groom. This all seems so whack to me. It’s hard not to feel like our feelings don’t matter in all this. It seems like mom and I are against everyone else in all this and it’s breaking my heart and obviously my moms too. I have been having a very hard time dealing with it already and it hasn’t even come yet. I don’t want to freakin’ see her or him with her! And oh my gosh if she approaches me there is absolutely no telling what would come out of my mouth. But I would imagine it wouldn’t be very becoming or lady-like. While I have forgiven her, I still have very strong feelings of dislike for her because of her part in breaking up my family.
And just an FYI, it’s not just me and my mom who are going to be thrust into this situation of seeing their “happy little family” for the first time. No one in my mom’s family has even seen my dad since he left. None of them have ever seen Andrea. It’s not just me and mom all this is going to impact. My mom’s brother Bernie considered my dad his best friend at one time. And some of my aunt and uncles girls were so young when dad left that I’m not sure they really ever understood why he all of a sudden wasn’t with us when we would go visit. There are going to be a lot of very mixed emotions involving all of this. You can forgive and move on but the emotions of things never go away when something like this has happened to you.
And what makes it all even harder for me? I won’t have Charles there by my side at the rehearsal dinner because of his work schedule. He is everything to me and he won’t be there to support, encourage, distract me, and love me. I’m having a very hard time with that. And come the wedding while I believe he’ll be able to go into work a few hours late that day so he can attend. I will not be sitting next to him, my mom or my family because I will be in the wedding.
All of this is so hard. I don’t know how I’m every going to deal with it all. More and more just keeps getting piled on top of all this stuff and I really don’t know how much more I can handle. I know the Lord does not let us go through anything that we cannot get through with His help but I just wish this didn’t have to be. I’ve already been through so much and goodness knows mom has. I also know that we learn and get stronger from the hard things. But like I told a co-worker, I’m tired of learning and getting stronger! None of this is how I ever thought I would feel going into my brother’s wedding and it has been very challenging to try and focus of the positive things, not worry, not be anxious, etc.
So I guess to sum this all up I need some major prayer regarding all this. As does my mom. I know that I somehow need to let dad know that I am not going to be ready for hugs or to be close to him come the rehearsal dinner and then wedding. But I really don’t know how to go about doing so. If you’ve ready all this through, thank you so much and if you have any advice or suggestions please let me know. However, if you’re going to say forgive and forget or anything along those lines please take your mouse and click away from this page.
Kristal
Thought I would share a few of my favorite pictures from my vacation. Click on the first picture to see it enlarged and on the same page you will be able to click through all the pictures while they are enlarged. Let me know what you think! Those of you who are on my myspace and facebook friends lists will get to see the rest of the pictures soon. I hope to have them all edited and posted by today.
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- Our first glimpse of the ocean! 3/1/09
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- I love the sky in this shot! 3/1/09
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- Me & mom on our first trip to see the ocean. 3/1/09
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- The setting sun through a palm tree. 3/3/09
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- Tybee Island Lighthouse at sunset. 3/3/09
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- Hilton Head Island, SC 3/4/09
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- A lone Sandpiper. 3/5/09
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- Oh what a beautiful day it was! 3/5/09
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- We found lots of Sand Dollars. 3/5/09
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- I love the lens flare on this one. 3/6/09
Today is my first day back at work since returning from vacation. (Don’t you just hate returning and getting back into your routine? I sure do.) Mom and I went to Hilton Head Island, SC and once again, it did not disappoint! This year it was just the two of us which was a rather refreshing change. While I love my brother dearly it was nice to be able to get some quality “girl” time with mom. We had so much fun! We really enjoyed being able to do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted to do it without being concerned that Daniel didn’t want to participate. The weather was on the chilly side in the beginning of the week but by Wednesday it started to warm up and the days just got warmer as they went along. On the days that were too cold to be at the beach we hung around in our room being lazy, went shopping and made a trip over to Savannah again.
One of the stores we hit was Michaels. Oh how I missed this store! Here in Sevierville there is no Michaels and the nearest one is somewhere in Knoxville. Mom and I had not been in one since we lived in Plano, TX….which was nearly 11 years ago now. We really enjoyed being able to go up one aisle and down the other taking in all the crafty supplies. We seriously spent like 4 hours in the store! lol And I found some INCREDIBLE bargains on wedding things that I just had to get. I had promised myself a while ago that I would not begin wedding planning until I had my ring (which I’m still waiting on). However, I found some gorgeous invitations that will be perfect for my theme and color scheme and I just knew if I didn’t get them that I would regret it later. I also found wedding programs, bubble wands, a parasol for Eden (who will be my flower girl), and lots of ribbon needed for various things. I got the invitations and programs on sale at incredible prices, it was such a blessing. More on that once I actually get my ring and can start a wedding blog. lol
On days when it was warm, we spent several hours at the beach from around noon to 3-4ish. It was so beautiful out! And of course I got sooo sunburned. Stupid me didn’t put any sunscreen on my chest the first day and as a result I was as red as a lobster. 
It’s my own fault entirely though. I can’t ever win. If I use sunscreen I get NO sun (most of the time) and if I don’t I either get burned to a crisp or get no sun. It’s so weird. So I opted to go without sunscreen and boy did I regret that. I guess I need to get it in my head that it would be better not to get any sun than burn so badly. *shrugs* I just really wanted to leave with a tan since I’m going to be in my brothers wedding in a little over a month and will be wearing a black dress that will make me look even whiter than I already am. Maybe some day I’ll learn that white is better than red. lol
In other news, there are still some very difficult things that I’m dealing with. I cannot go into it here so please just keep me in your prayers if you would. Every time I think things are finally calming down something else happens. I’m just so ready for it all to be over with so I don’t have to deal with it anymore. I need patience, grace, mercy, wisdom, discernment, and an attitude that can only come from Christ so please be in prayer about those things for me. I love you all and hope you are all doing well!
Kristal
